Photo by Brooke Williams
Not every scientist delves into the mysteries of the electron or classifies heretofore unknown species. Anyone who questions, who examines, who extrapolates – is a scientist of sorts.
Malcolm Gladwell is one such person, a social scientist (or as Wikipedia denotes, ‘pop sociologist’). He has written some insanely insightful books, the most recent of which is Outliers: The Story of Success.
Dan Coleman of Open Culture recently posted Malcolm Gladwell’s TED talk from 2007. TED (Technology, Entertainment, Design) is invitation only, an event where the world’s preeminent thinkers come together to share information and inspiration.
It is the first time I have seen this remarkable speech.
Central to the talk is the idea that people do not know what they want. That you cannot simply ask, as had been the modus operandi for early marketers in this country.
Many people in the ‘pickup artist’ community, too, insist that women simply do not know what they want. They advise adherents that though, when asked, women will tell you – earnestly, sincerely, helpfully – what they want, that theirs is actually the worst advice to take. (That was a little galling the first time I heard it.)
Is it merely an issue of articulation? One of conception? Or can we not step outside our ‘programming’ to even imagine the possibilities? Is, in fact, endless possibility frightening?
What is Happiness?
In much of man’s search for fulfillment, for meaning, for happiness, there is the idea that there are parameters to our happiness. That specific career or income or expression of purpose will equal our happiness…our delirious contentment.
But, as Viktor Frankl pointed out, happiness is relative. Before stepping into the career of our passion, while still in the environment of university, were we unhappy? Did we simply not know any better?
No. Life is a journey without destination. Though Hallmark has beat us over the head with that sentiment, it is not any less true.
Without Limits
Imagine winning the lottery and having oodles of money and time to engage in whatever one pleases.
Do we pursue the attainment of fame and accolades? What are accolades but the acknowledgment that other people admire and respect us. At it’s core, this yearning for fame or awards or our own Wikipedia page is the desire to be honored and esteemed by our community.
Sometimes I imagine I’d travel, but as exotic and interesting as far off locales may be, eventually I realized that the experience would not be as fun and exciting without someone, without people, to share it with.
How to Find Happiness
Malcolm Gladwell closes his talk with the observation that it is through embracing the diversity of human beings that we will find the way to true happiness. Through embracing human beings will we find delicious contentment.
And while exploring our purpose and passion is an almost inescapable drive, exploring and building our communities is truly its complementary imperative.
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January 21, 2009 at 7:37 pm
Night Writer
The secret to happiness is knowing your purpose. As Myles Munroe wrote, “Where purpose is unknown, abuse is inevitable.” That is, when you don’t know the purpose of something, you will end up abusing it. Even if you know or can guess 70-80% of the purpose you’ll still miss out. If you don’t know what the purpose of friendship is, or of marriage, or of any interaction with others the relationship can and likely will be abused. Similarly, if you don’t know the purpose of money, or credit … well, look around. Munroe, by the way, says the definition of “abuse” comes from the combination of two words: “abnormal” and “use”; if you don’t know something’s purpose – be it an institution, tool or your own self – you will abnormally use it.
We can say, “Well of course I know what the purpose of something means to me…” but as Jeremiah wrote, “The heart is deceitful above all things,” meaning it even lies to us about what we think we want.
So how do we discover our purpose or the purpose of anything? Ah, grasshopper, we may have to write that book. In the meantime, rather than be paralyzed, go by Micah 6, “Act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with your God.”
hayden tompkins says:
I do agree that purpose is important, but so many people concentrate on purpose and skip the importance of the human element of our lives. I read article after article discussing finding purpose, or making money, or starting a business, or whatever but I really think the unspoken corollary is one of community. I think that is why, for example, churches are so powerful. They provide a community in support of a specific purpose, and so the exercise of that purpose can be deeper and more profound than the singular experience.
Anyway, I do agree with you. (I’ve written enough articles in a similar mien.) I just don’t think people realize just how important community – interaction with others – is so important to our mental and emotional well-being.
P.S. The video is just phenomenal and Malcolm Gladwell is a fascinating observationalist.
January 21, 2009 at 7:48 pm
pannonica
Just to tie together a couple of your blog’s recent posts and comments:
• Malcolm Gladwell is biracial.
• He was featured on a different episode of Radiolab (the subject was “Choice.” See the segment entitled “Is Free Will Really Free?” The whole thing is facinating, but in the last 4 minutes of the piece Gladwell digresses into societal perceptions and preconceptions of race. Interesting and not a little troubling.
p.s. Yes I am home from work today and am avoiding doing some tasks by internetizing. Okay, many tasks.
hayden tompkins says:
Well, it’s definitely been instructive!
I’ve kept up with Malcolm Gladwell for a while and I absolutely love the way he synthesizes information. I’m convinced he is one of our generation’s best thinkers. (…philosopher scientist?)
January 21, 2009 at 10:28 pm
Night Writer
Interestingly enough, I came across this article in my work email today:
http://www.aarpmagazine.org/health/find_purpose_live_longer.html
It’s about the important role having a purpose plays in longevity and health. While I don’t endorse AARP politically, this is an interesting magazine.
hayden tompkins says:
January 22, 2009 at 12:22 am
mssc54
I have often wondered what the difference is between contentment and happiness.
Just this past Christmas, as I watched the kids, it struck me….
how content/happy and fulfilled my life seems to be.
I think true happiness can only be found “outside one’s self”. I don’t know if that makes sense to anyone else but it certainly does to me.
hayden tompkins says:
Absolutely.
January 22, 2009 at 12:37 pm
Kip de Moll
Forty years ago, we called it being “in the groove”, this miraculous place where everything slid into place and the glide was effortless ecstacy, the Rightness of the Universe. For me, no matter the activity, that moment invariably included music and the presence of significant others. At first, it was also often drug enhanced. The true journey began and continues with the efforts to recognize those moments in our daily clear-headed perceptions.
hayden tompkins says:
I absolutely feel you on music. I suspect that one reason (though I am not an expert) that certain substances work so well, is that they encourage one to drop their walls and open heart and mind.
January 22, 2009 at 5:47 pm
curlywurlygurly
i have learned that i get the most happiness in life by doing for others…teaching, volunteering, helping friends, etc. simple but true for me.
It makes me happy just reading that!
hayden tompkins says: