I spent 8 hours on Saturday bouncing around from casino to casino, watching people spend their paychecks in the hopes of hitting it big. (I almost had a heart attack when I saw a woman put $250 into a penny slot machine!)
And while at first the gamblers looked like rats at a feeder bar to me, slowly a different picture began to emerge. It was at the video poker machine, where I heard the first hint of a ‘gambler’s philosophy’.
If you are holding a safe, but relatively small-winning hand, and you have the opportunity – albeit small – to go for the insanely winning hand, then go for the winning hand.
Though the odds of being dealt a royal flush are semi-astronomical, the opportunity to even try is pretty astronomical.
Please don’t mistake me, I am not an advocate of gambling…but the fact is that we are gambling. Everyday. Some of us are playing it safe, others are – literally – going for broke.
“Should I take this lower paying position, but I have the possibility of becoming manager, or should I go for the higher paying position with no possibility of advancement?”
What no one ever tells us as kids, and what we probably would have ignored were we told anyway, is that constantly choosing the safe path circumscribes our choices so that we ultimately feel trapped by our lives.
Much of it starts with our parents, which is not surprising. Our parents want to ensure that we are safe and taken care of. And so they urge us toward ’safe’ careers and sometimes tell us that our dreams are unrealistic.
And perhaps they are, but that is the nature of dreaming…to reach for what is beyond possibility.
And while it takes courage to leap, it takes even greater courage to watch someone else leap – knowing full well they may fall flat on their faces, that the odds are against them – and support them anyway.
When we are young, we are surrounded by opportunity and so take them for granted. It isn’t until we are older, and the opportunities fewer, that we realize how precious they were. That it isn’t just the road not taken, it is taking the road which grows ever narrower with each passing year.
I guess this is why all the ‘chase your dreams’ people recommend doing what you love.

If your leap is an act of love, even if you fall on your face, you will have felt as though you have flown.





20 comments
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November 3, 2008 at 4:16 pm
Dereck
Priceless.
hayden tompkins says:
Yes – thank you Grandma.
November 3, 2008 at 4:34 pm
Connie
Awesome…my husband is the leaper and I am the net holder!!!
It has taken me a very long time to have the courage to leap!
One of my favorite sayings is “Leap and the Net will appear”
hayden tompkins says:
Leap and the net will appear! Ok, I said it – now where is your husband?!
November 3, 2008 at 4:47 pm
Amber
Hayden… this post touched me on so many counts. First of all you are seriously my soul sister. I would have had a heart attack at someone gambling like that too. I can’t take it. Secondly…. I love the last quote.. beautiful. Great writing today hon. I love this post… amazing. Thank you!
hayden tompkins says:
It actually isn’t a quote, but it touched me deeply when I wrote it so I gave it ginormous font. I’m very glad you liked the post. I was worried, actually. It is probably the shortest ‘real’ post I have ever written, but it just seemed ‘right’ as-is.
November 3, 2008 at 5:46 pm
cordieb
Wow, what a much needed inspiration! I can truely say that I needed this boost today! Thanks PI.
And too . . . even when a gambler hits it big; they continue to gamble – it’s not for the money that they gamble, it’s a feeling of excitement that the gambling brings. When we find anything that excites us like this, perhaps we should pursue it at all costs . . . what do you think? Is there madness in such? Should we maintain balance. So many questions . . .
hayden tompkins says:
If you find something that excites your soul, as-is, I say go for it! The only thing with gambling, I think, is that it isn’t so much the act of pushing a button but the possibility of a specific outcome that is exciting.
November 3, 2008 at 11:27 pm
Kip de Moll
There is a place I know in Oregon where surfers love to go. They tell me all the water is sucked out of the area by the wave on which they are riding. They are looking at massive rocks just 20 yards ahead which would kill them if they hit them. Turning to look over their shoulder, they often see a sea lion gleefully riding along with them.
hayden tompkins says:
Riding the edge can be beautiful; thanks for sharing this, Kip.
November 4, 2008 at 1:20 am
mssc54
Those of us who have had (or currently have) are familiure with the child who repeatedly asks for the same thing… over and over and over.
If we get “worn out” by their persistance and snap at them that is the beginning of killing the spirit of “I can”.
If we parents would have more patience and find some way to let them “win” our children will keep a bit of that “I will” in them a bit longer.
There is nothing wrong with failure as long as we continue to get back in the game and keep going.
It’s only failure if you stop trying.
hayden tompkins says:
Yes! Beautifully written, Mssc54.
I think I read somewhere that as long as you give your children another option – like if they ask for sugary cereal and you tell them that they can have it on Sunday but how about ants on a log NOW – they are much happier.
November 4, 2008 at 1:39 am
Pace
YEAH!
I wish I had something more to say, but you’ve said it all.
YEAH!
hayden tompkins says:
November 4, 2008 at 1:03 pm
Francesca
Hi Hayden, I found your site by chance & via a long comments thread / guest poster on Writerdad. Anyway – I’m really pleased I found it as I’ve enjoyed your blogs very much = Thanks!
hayden tompkins says:
Francesca, thanks for stopping over! I never thought that fiasco of a comment thread would have brought as many new people as it has. But I am delighted to be making many new friends!
November 4, 2008 at 1:25 pm
thedailydish
Hello stranger!! SO were you out in Vegas for the weekend?? Can;t imagine much wilder than Vegas for Halloween — CRAZY! Hope it was fun.
PS: we went to the casino this weekend, but just for dinner – NOOOOO GAMBLING. I do have some self control amazingly.
PPS: BARACK THE VOTE BABY!!
hayden tompkins says:
It was in Tunica, Mississippi. Chris has been trying to get me to Vegas FOR AGES. I have resisted. Especially when I hear all the stories about how he took his previous paramours to Vegas, I am suddenly struck with a strong yearning for the Caribbean!
PPS: I have vowed not to watch election news today except that Chris hasn’t made that vow and he keeps telling me about all the updates. He is watching the polls and the DOW at the same time, LOL.
November 4, 2008 at 4:52 pm
cordieb
So true. I never thought about it that way. That’s what the excitement is always about. . . . Again, thanks for the inspiration!
November 4, 2008 at 5:38 pm
Birdie!
This: http://www.amazon.com/Chance-Guide-Gambling-Market-Everything/dp/1568583168
hayden tompkins says:
I’ll definitely check that out. Looks fascinating.
November 4, 2008 at 7:19 pm
sarah von
Well, well stated. This is the only life we have, right?
hayden tompkins says:
Yes!
November 4, 2008 at 7:47 pm
SanityFound
They all went and said what I wanted to say, but one thing is for sure… incredible, really incredible… you never stop astounding me!
hayden tompkins says:
:heart melting:
November 5, 2008 at 3:58 am
Jamie Simmerman
Beautiful post, Hayden. I think you just made this week’s Blog Nirvana. Look for a pingback.
hayden tompkins says:
Wow, thank you!
November 8, 2008 at 11:02 am
Blog Nirvana: Blind Monkeys in Straight Jackets, Passion, and Dreams : Blue Duck Copy
[...] “If your leap is an act of love, even if you fall on your face, you will have felt as though you have flown.” Hayden Tompkins http://persistentillusion.wordpress.com/2008/11/03/the-courage-to-leap/ [...]
November 10, 2008 at 8:50 pm
Weekly Fruit Salad ~ [place number here] « SanityFound’s Rambling’s
[...] vicariously through your child. Sad as it is we all need to find our own Way Back and build up The Courage to Leap with Puppy Size love. Block and tackle, gain your individuality back, Accept things as they are [...]
December 1, 2008 at 7:48 am
Carnival of Personal Development Edition #1 | Insight Writer
[...] Tompkins presents The Courage to Leap posted at Through The [...]
December 1, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Carnival of Personal Development « Through The Illusion
[...] if you missed “The Courage to Leap” by moi, here is your chance to read this fabulous article. Possibly related posts: [...]
December 1, 2008 at 7:10 pm
SimplyForties
Very inspiring. It’s so difficult to leave the safety of what we know for what we don’t know. You are so right about watching others. My son will graduate from college soon and plans to head off to L.A. to launch a film career. That’s hard to stand by and watch!
hayden tompkins says:
Wow, no kidding!
I actually have a friend who moved out there to be an actress. It was hard to be supportive knowing the statistics but at the least it should be an amazing life experience.
December 3, 2008 at 5:29 pm
Ruth
Wow. This post took my breath away, it’s so right on to what I needed to hear at this point in my life. I’ve been looking for the courage to make some major life changes and you’ve helped me to find a little bit more of it. Thanks!
If you get a chance to check out Azeem Kayum’s book Wrestling With the Goddess, I think you might really enjoy it. Never mind courage to leap, his story is more like courage to live.
hayden tompkins says:
I will definitely check out that book. Thanks, Ruth!!