Set Your Life on Fire
Day 174
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I’ve been thinking hard about what I want. Very hard. What do I want to do? How do I want to live my passion and purpose? How on earth will I make money at it? (Man cannot live on overdue bills alone.)

And nothing, absolutely nothing, was coming to the fore.
- I tried imagining that I’d won the lottery and could, therefore, do anything I wanted. What would that be?
- I imagained that I was famous, and that I was on Oprah. What did I want to talk about?
- I pretended that I was the most successful person at my highschool reunion. What was I telling my former classmates?
I found out that if I was a multi-millionaire, all I wanted to do was eat good food and spend lots of time at tropical beaches. If I was on Oprah, it seemed that all I wanted to do was to talk politics and social issues. As the most successful person at my high school reunion, all I wanted to do was look fabulous and hear about what everyone else was up to. (Then I got sidetracked by looking up some deliciously retro pinup-style outfits.)

The let’s-pretend method was clearly not getting me anywhere.
And then I remembered the ‘pretty goth song’ I posted in 10 Things You Didn’t Know About Me. And I realized that the question wasn’t “what do I want to do?”, the question is “who do I want to be?” But it was this stanza that struck the bell of my soul:
But maybe you touch one life
And the world becomes a better place to be
Maybe you give their dreams another day
Another chance to be free
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve listened to that song and just hadn’t heard that.
I’m just a little closer to aligning with the understanding of my purpose, of what I am supposed to do. Someone, clearly, doesn’t want me spending my life at the beach.
Dangit.





7 comments
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July 1, 2008 at 6:35 pm
Lisa
Great post. I have exactly the same problem – i try to think what I want, and nothing (absolutely nothing) comes to mind. the other day on internet i saw there was a show on Oprah about attracting things (louise hay, cheryl richardson, martha beck) and they all suggest making vision boards, and I was like, OH GOD, please. It seems so small and meaningless to me. Every idea I have of what I think i want passes within a week or two. Mostly what I want is freedom to write and be and read, and be happy. I don’t need a lot, and I don’t want a lot, but I DO NOT want to work 9-5. I do not want to ever have to put on a uniform, and I don’t ever want to have to clock hours. I want to write and pay bills and travel and be happy. (and to look like that pin-up girl – love the shoes! love the dress! love the bow!)
hayden tompkins says:
Right now I am in loooove with pinup style! (Might I add, to my husband’s delight.)
I can definitely appreciate not wanting to work from 9-5. I don’t object working 9-5, I just wish my hours could be flexible. Maybe 8:45am-5:45pm. Maybe 11am-8pm. Whatever I felt like. I actually enjoy working, I just don’t particularly like the ‘work’ that I am doing now. Well, except for the fact that it allows me to write and connect with people. That I LOVE.
July 2, 2008 at 12:09 am
mssc54
I dear emos emit oga taht eno fo eht tseb syaw ot deeccus si ot pleh srehto deeccus.
(since you are dyslexic I wanted to make that first sentence easy for you.)
Translation:
I read some time ago that one of the best ways to succeed is to help others succeed.
hayden tompkins says:
You are so thoughtful, LOL.
July 2, 2008 at 12:49 pm
Connie
I thought you knew what you wanted, just haven’t quite planned out how to make it happen. I am reading “Steering by Starlight” by Martha Beck.
It could be helpful for you, she also has one, not sure of the exact title, “Finding Your Own Northstar”. Please do not discount the vision board idea it has been very, very helpful to many people. That is a huge part of activity at the Great Big Dreams Retreats I attend and I have been completely amazed at my “dreams” and what came forward in my mind for me. Christine Kane has a post on her blog about vision boards and it is very good. http://christinekane.com
I have faith in you!!! Too bad about the beach though!
hayden tompkins says:
My purpose is to serve, to protect, and to love others. But how do I translate it into something useful? That description could apply equally to a police officer, a teacher, a pastor. (et cetera)
I guess my question is really, “How best can I love the world?”
July 2, 2008 at 7:16 pm
cordieb
One thing I’ve found is once we get what we think we want, we always seem to want something else; isn’t that irony of adam and eve and why woman have so many pairs of shoes – enough is never enough . . . When we find joy in helping others, we find satisfaction in helping more! Great Article PI.
hayden tompkins says:
It’s so funny you said that. At GorgeousForGod today, Lisa said this:
When it is YOUR plan: it will feel like WORK.
When it is the HOLY SPIRIT’S plan: it will be EASY.
July 2, 2008 at 9:37 pm
InSanityFound
What will be will be, I get the feeling you already have the answer before you – hows the bike?
hayden tompkins says:
They haven’t called me yet. Looks like I will have to up and buy another tank of gas.
I was so looking forward to this being my last!
July 3, 2008 at 12:36 am
cory huff
Hayden, I’m sure you’ll find your purpose. Try not to let it be defined by a career – or, at least, not just a career.
You are truly awesome. BTW, I’m a guy, and that dress on that girl is absolutely fantastic.
hayden tompkins says:
Isn’t it?!
July 8, 2008 at 5:39 pm
Millionaire Sunglasses
Successful woman what a inspiration !
hayden tompkins says:
Thank you!