As many of you know, I have been in the process of developing a business. The good news: it looks like I will be able to release “How I Converted a Romantic Atheist” on Monday! The bad news: someone has already set up a company that uses my first product.
Yesterday, when I bumbled across it, my heart stopped in my chest and I could feel my skin go cold.
All my hard work, my dreams for helping others, all the money I’ve spent; all of it flashed before my eyes. I felt humiliated and stupid and, for a second, I wanted to crawl into a hole for 3 months and try not to think about it. I wasn’t fast enough, smart enough, or good enough.
I had failed.
The Bricks Walls Are There For A Reason
…to stop anyone who doesn’t want it badly enough. I got myself together after about 10 minutes, but that lingering feeling of panic had me on edge. Now what? Now what?
Creation Not Competition
My company is not about blasting any competition out of the water. Even when I felt I would be the first with this suite of products and services, and I figured someone would try and capitalize on ‘my’ ideas, I believed that customer service – not a product line – comes first and foremost.
This country is based on the idea that more than one company can execute an idea; it’s a major reason why we innovate.
I had to get back in touch with the belief that my company is not about what other people are doing. It’s about what I am doing. Just as you can’t go through life sidetracked by what the people around you are doing or thinking about you, so too can you not effectively run your business that way.
Really, there is enough to go around. This mentality is not about scarcity but about creativity and abundance. But boy did I need a reminder.
Lit A Fire Under My A…
You can believe that I was absolutely motivated yesterday. I was forced to reevaluate my concept of what needed priority, analyze how I had been spending my time, and look at where I was spending my money.
Basically, I had a biz-life crisis.
Running Away
The temptation is to run away from the things that make us feel ‘bad’ or unworthy. But one thing I have learned is that when you want to avoid something, when something scares you, that is the moment you need to stand up and step forward.
Stand Up and Step Forward
Be responsible for your actions. Be ready for opportunity. Above all, be persistent in your courage.





9 comments
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June 5, 2008 at 9:32 pm
SanityFound
How positively true and who is to say that they who went before you will last or that you can’t examine their short falls and build on them
Good for you!
June 6, 2008 at 12:17 am
thedailydish
Hayden, you are totally right. Competition drives creativity. But even so, people will naturally be drawn to you and your company b/c of who YOU are. Your charisma is enchanting. Just look how many flock to your blog! You have made genuine, solid friendships w/ people all over the world – people who trust and value your opinion. I cannot imagine how successful you will be w/ your own business! Just remember me when you are wealthy beyond measure. Maybe toss a pepper grinder my way – HAH! Love you babe – only positive thoughts.
hayden tompkins says:
Still working on that air horn…
June 6, 2008 at 1:21 am
cordieb
Oh PI, you need not worry. With your uncanny drive, creative mind, and compassion for people (customers included), you’ll be very successful in any venture you choose. I only wish I could have you as business partner.
Peace, Light and Love,
CordieB.
hayden tompkins says:
Well, at the very least, I feel much better after having read that!
June 6, 2008 at 7:32 pm
vanessaleighsblog
PI: I absolutely agree, that when we feel the most fearful, is when we need to push ourselves the most, to get out of the rut, and get moving with the “business” of living our lives. Life is not for the faint of heart, so they say…..glad to hear that you were not discouraged for long.
hayden tompkins says:
‘get out of the rut’ – That’s a perfect description.
June 7, 2008 at 10:25 am
zeynepankara
You have a very nice space here. And I like the way of your thinking. Have a good weekend, cheers, Zeynep xx
hayden tompkins says:
Thanks for stopping by!
June 7, 2008 at 11:10 am
marlajayne
I’ve just got to put my two cents’ worth in. I think the fact that you had the idea and have been diligently pursuing your dream for the past several months means that “Spirit” was working with you. Truly, when something needs to be done, something or someone divine whispers it to our minds, and we start thinking, “Hey, I think I’m going to …..” Some people ignore these impressions and go on about their daily round of getting and spending, and then six months or a year down the line, they learn that someone has stolen their idea. In your case, you took heed to the “promptings,” and to me that means that your work is unique and different (hmmm, I guess that would be the unique part!), and that yo’re the only person who can do this in this particular day. Look at Gateway and Dell and all the other computers…..Adidas and Nike, Piggly Wiggly and Food Lion, Avon and Cover Girl, Estee Lauder and Clinique, and so on.
Hey, I love that abundance mentality idea. Have you read S. Covey’s comments on that?
As the young people say, “You rock!” Don’t quit.
hayden tompkins says:
As in, Steven Covey, “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”?
June 7, 2008 at 8:08 pm
Whoa what a week! « SanityFound’s Rambling’s
[...] well… go read its excellent! The post that really got to me this week though was “What To Do When You Fail” (no explanation [...]
June 9, 2008 at 6:16 pm
Connie
When you plant a seed, a little dirt always comes up. In your case, another business “selling” your dream. Did you ever see the movie, “Field of Dreams’? If you build it, they will come. With positive intent, your intelligence, motivation and all the other good stuff, I know you will be most successful with any endeavor you pursue. Keep the dream moving forward!!!
hayden tompkins says:
You can bet I’m motivated now!
June 12, 2008 at 9:05 pm
Mike Carrieri
I have failed many times to not do what was right. I’m at a point now where it’s caught up to me. Not a good feeling. My friends say it all ends up good, but life may just be a wave. If you pick high points to start and end with, it looks good. Failure is only when you look at the low points.
As for your product being taken over, yes your services can be better, but also look to increasing the market. Your competition will not see the opportunities the same way you do. Also, they may have succeeded in getting up first, but you can still beat them out the door. Good luck!
hayden tompkins says:
Thank you! (‘Increasing the market’ is perfect for what I am doing!)