The Answer to Life, The Universe, and Everything

I have been tagged by thedailydish to answer questions of depth and import, to divulge the secret contents of my mind, and to bare naked the layers of my soul.

Let’s begin.

1.  You are going to be stranded, Survivor style, on a tropical island. You will have only the clothes on your back. Basic food & water will be provided. Name 3 things you would bring (and they cannot be PEOPLE).

The Foundation Anthology, The Hitchhiker’s Guide Anthology, and the BIGGEST jumbo MP3 player known to mankind with a ginormous selection of music, audiobooks, and pictures of my Beloved. 

Besides, if I can’t ‘jungle boogie’ on a deserted island then what’s the point of living.

2.  Name one person (famous or not) you have a *secret crush* on and WHY.

Hey, who have you been talking to?  What have you heard?!  I categorically deny everything.

3.  What was the last thing you did before getting on the computer?

Wake up.

4.  Name one thing you are ashamed of about yourself.

My unadulterated love of Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls.  I absolutely will not share unless on pain of death.

 5.  How long does it take you to get dressed in the morning? 

Wake up.  Pick up the house.  Shower.  Artfully muss up my hair.  Get dressed. 

This whole process takes less than 30 minutes.

6.   Since you all know I am food-obsessed, humor me by describing your last meal – if you could plan it.

Start off with mango lessee, a Jamaican beef patty, and taquitos.  Soup of tom kha chicken. 

Move to appetizer of masuman.  Then chicken tikka masala and nan.  Next orange chicken and then finally salmon nagiri. 

First main course would be a Dream Roll from Fuji Sushi with lemon wasabi, shrimp tempura roll, and the Dynamite Roll from Amura’s (downtown Orlando). 

Second course would be pan seared tuna and filet mignon (rubbed in herbs by a virginal shepardess who has taken a vow of silence) with horse radish and au jus sauce.  Third course would be chicken masala and mushrooms.  (Mushrooms hand gathered, of course, by Benedictine monks.)

Fourth course would be 2 McDonald’s 85 cent hamburgers, slightly smooshed, and a medium fry. 

Then a desert of Swiss Cake Rolls.  followed by a chocolate lava cake.  Finished with rocky road ice cream,

Then I would explode because I ate too much.

7.  What is your middle name? Does it have any significance?

Blythe.  It’s a family name.

8.  Name one thing you have always wanted but HAVE NEVER HAD.

The bouncy thing from Tomb Raider, where it looks like she is just flying through the air.

9.  How did you meet your spouse or s/o?

I met him when I was out dancing and asked him not to take my picture. 

10.  Tell me a joke. Pictures are acceptable.

You want a joke?  Question #6 made me hungry.