Rules for Success: #2

2.  Socialize, but do not gossip.  You’ve seen them, those quirky coworkers of yours; either they never leave their desk, no one talks to them, and they seem Unabomberesque or they are constantly talking to others about people in the office.

Despite processes established to make raises and promotions as objective as possible, when you get down to it, superiors want to reward people that they like.

It’s important not to confuse being social with being nice; a pleasant and mannerly demeanor is incorporated into social interactions, but someone who thinks they need to be ‘nice’ all the time will not engender any respect or promotions.

Why is it important to socialize?  Investing the time to connect with your coworkers and superiors transforms your job from the grind to something you can enjoy everyday.  The amazing thing is that being socially awesome has a recursive effect at the office, just as being bitter does. 

People should enjoy working with you.

The line between socializing and gossip is a fine one.  People like talking about people; one explanation for our obsession with celebrities.  You may even be concerned about some of the people which you are talking about.

People assume that gossip has to be along the lines of “Did you hear about Jeanine?  Jack is always taking her out to three hour lunches.  When they come back her breath smells like alcohol!”

Gossip, however, can be as simple as discussing how much work someone else is doing or not doing.  Perhaps you are discussing someone’s medical issue with a third-party or the fact that a coworker is never on time. 

If you wouldn’t say it in front of the person you are discussing, then it’s probably gossip.

It is notoriously easy to fall victim to office gossip, so always take caution in what you tell others about yourself and your extracurricular activities — whether they involve co-workers or not. Your professional persona is at stake, so keep a lid on getting trashed and laid over the weekend; stay mum on your search for another job or how difficult your boss can be, and remember to remain professional in all conversations.

-Askmen.com 

Sometimes you are having a stressful day and you may feel like you’ll explode if you don’t get something off your chest.  A workplace will have a certain amount of friction, regardless of what is going on, and it is very natural for people who are frustrated to lose their tempers and want to vent.  This is what your work buddy is for, to have someone you can vent to safely and in confidence. 

The goal is to establish trust with your coworkers, and if you are gossiping with them they are going to wonder what you tell other people when they aren’t around.

Gossip isn’t all bad; you should be aware of what’s going on in the office in which you are working.  Sometimes gossip can give you a heads up on the availability of a position, or can advise you when someone is a serial backstabber.

No one is perfect, but if you concentrate on being a center of calm in an otherwise crazy universe, someone who is full of joy, and a person who cares about others – then your opportunities for success and advancement will be greater.

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If you liked this article check out Rules for Success: #1 or How to Stop Complainers in Their Tracks.